Giants do FALL! :D

Giants do die! The bigger they are the harder they FALL! .... Let God ARISE, Giants DIE!!! =D

Only HOPE

"Only Hope"

[Written by Switchfoot]

There's a song that's inside of my soul

It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again

I'm awake in the infinite cold

But You sing to me over and over and over again

So I lay my head back down

And I lift my hands

and pray to be only Yours

I pray to be only Yours

I know now you're my only hope

Sing to me the song of the stars

Of Your galaxy dancing and laughing

and laughing again

When it feels like my dreams are so far

Sing to me of the plans that You have for me over again

So I lay my head back down

And I lift my hands and pray

To be only yours

I pray to be only yours

I know now you're my only hope

I give You my destiny

I'm giving You all of me

I want Your symphony

Singing in all that I am

At the top of my lungs I'm giving it back

So I lay my head back down

And I lift my hands and pray

To be only yours

I pray to be only yours

I pray to be only yours

I know now you're my only hope

LORD be my ALL!

Found this note saved on my laptop... one of the prayers I wrote to God a while back. 

THANK YOU GOD!!!!!!

JESUS THANK YOU !

THANK YOU FOR YOUR LOVE

FOR BEING GOOD TO ME EVEN WHEN i DON'T DESERVE IT

LORD DRAW ME CLOSE TO YOU

YOU SAID THAT I SHOULD DRAW NEAR TO YOU AND YOU WILL DRAW NEAR TO ME

LORD YOU PROMISED AND YOU CAN NEVER LIE

LORD AM DEDICATING THIS QUARTER TO YOU

WHERE IT'S NOT ABOUT ME BUT ALL ABOUT YOU

LORD COME BE THE CENTER OF MY LIFE

BE MY ALL

CAUSE I AM NOTHING WITHOUT YOU

EVERYTHING I DO IS MEANINGLESS IF NOT FOR YOU

LORD TEACH ME YOUR WAYS

I KNOW THAT I STRAYED EVEN AFTER BEING CLOSE TO YOU BUT I ASK YOU TO FORGIVE ME

I AGREE THAT WE SHOULD REASON TOGETHER SO THAT THOUGH MY SINS ARE LIKE SCARLET THEY SHALL BE AS WHITE AS SNOW

CLEANSED BY THE BLOOD OF JESUS

THOUGH THEY ARE AS RED AS CRIMSON, THEY SHALL BE LIKE WOOL

LORD I AM WILLING

SEARCH MY HEART, TEST MY ANXIOUS THOUGHTS. SEE IF THERE'S ANY OFFENSIVE WAY IN ME, AND LEAD ME IN THE WAY EVERLASTING.

LORD TAKE THE BROKEN PIECES OF MY LIFE 

i SURRENDER ALL OF THEM TO YOU

AND CREATE THE MOSAIC OF MY FUTURE AS YOU WILL

USE IT ALL FOR YOUR GLORY

WAKE ME UP INSIDE

I WANT TO SEE YOU, OPEN MY EYES

LAST Holiday

My big sis Sheila in Kenya wrote to me on What'sApp asking how I was doing coz she had a dream about me.  I asked her about it and this is what she said: "Yvonne (another big sis) told me she was told you were in an accident and you died. So I kept thinking about it and I was very sad. I kept saying,"Yaani you are dead and the way you are young." Then I was wondering if you were right with God and if you went to heaven. And Yvonne was saying that she kept on telling you to do things as God would want you to."

 

My sister's dream was really convicting and it made me cry. It was the same conviction that was heavy on my heart after Spring quarter and after this summer session. It also reminded me of Queen Latifa's movie, LAST Holiday. You can check out the trailer above. She was living in a shell all her life, she had a "Book of possibilities" where she recorded pictures of all her dreams and desires for her life and future but she never did anything about it apart from dream until she was diagnosed with a brain tumor then she quit her job, sold her bonds and went off to live out her dreams. She told her friend, "Remember when you said life is too short to live the way I do... I quit." She quit on her old way of life: safe, not taking any risks, lonely, not satisfying. And she decided to live her life the way she always dreamed to. To her reflection in the mirror: "Next time we will laugh more, we'll love more. We just won't be so afraid." And when she did, she gave her all, had lots of fun and made many friends but she was sad that it was almost time to die but then she found out that she was actually misdiagnosed and so she had the second chance to keep the new life that she had begun.

I had watched this movie last Winter break and it was convicting and it also made me cry. This year (2013) I feel like God was setting me up to believe that it was my last time in SB so that I could give my all before I left. But what ended up happening was, when it came to relationships, I really wanted to   share my whole heart but then I wouldn't go all the way coz I'd be like, "Well what's the point. I'm about to leave soon anyway. What difference does it make." So I'd hold back then go back home and be filled with anguish and regret then God would open a door for me to come back and the cycle continued. The dream and the movie reminded me of these verses:

"Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." (Psalm 90:12)

"Show me, LORD, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting my life is." (Psalm 39:4)

"I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the LORD has done." (Psalm 118:17) I'll finish strong! I'll finish! By His Spirit! Lord help me yield my heart wholly and continually to You! =)

It's not time to dwell on the past. Now's the time to move forward trusting in God and resting in His Grace. It's time for me to step out, to be myself. It's time for us to PREPARE THE WAY FOR THE LORD!! =)  (post: "What's your name?") Take a listen to the song below... I know it's sung by kids but God really spoke to me through it. It was everything I needed to hear at the time.

  

(Got so many posts in my drafts from the summer and before that coz I stopped sharing but I'm back to sharing :)
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After I did this post I God was reminding me how much He loves me. He is not disappointed in me. He is not angry with me. He's not disappointed because His hope is not in me. He is Hope. Jesus Christ, the Hope of glory living inside me. So just to rest in His Love. There's no shame and no condemnation in Him. (post: No Shame)

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11/30/2013 I heard that Paul Walker died and people have been posting that all over fb as well. Reminded me about this post. God has been reminding me to do things His way coz it's the only way that counts in the end. He wants me to live out my destiny, not to shrink back not to hold back, not to be discouraged and distracted by the ways of life but to fix my eyes on Him and cling to Him and His Word more and more. So yeah, Lord, help me let go and flow with Your Spirit, in Jesus name Amen :)

Make it Real

So much craziness surrounding me

So much going on, it gets hard to breathe
When all my faith has gone, 

you bring it back to me

You make it real for me

When I'm not sure of my priorities
When I've lost sight of where I'm meant to be
Like holy water washing over me

You make it real for me

And I'm running to you, baby Jesus
You are the only one who saves me
That's why I've been missing You lately
Cause you make it real for me

When my head is strong but my heart is weak
I'm full of arrogance and uncertainty
When I can't find the words
You teach my heart to speak
You make it real for me, yeah

And I'm running to you, baby Jesus
You are the only one who saves me
That's why I've been missing you lately
Cause you make it real for me

Everybody's talking in words I don't understand
You got to be the only one who knows just who I am
You're shining in the distance, I hope I can make it through
'Cause the only place that I want to be
Is right back home with You

I guess there's so much more I have to learn
But if you're here with me, I know which way to turn
You always give me somewhere, somewhere I can run
You make it real for me

And I'm running to you, baby Jesus
You are the only one who saves me
That's why I've been missing you lately
'Cause you make it real for me
Yes, you do, you make it real for me

{James Morrison - You Make It Real}

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“He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy. Blessed is the man who always fears the LORD, but he who hardens his heart 
falls into trouble.” (Proverbs 28:13-14)

My phone froze today (9/3/13) ... which made me aware of the condition of my heart... stone cold. frozen. I have been really rebellious this summer. Not listening to God. Not resting in Him. Not listening to my heart. Making me the lovely mess I am. God told me to follow my heart but it's hard to follow a heart that's been hardened. Hardened by mentalities of the past: everything I tried failed so why should I try again and I know (based on the past) that it will fail. It's hard to put my heart out there again even though I want to and plan to, it's easier to stay hidden behind defensive walls. But when I do hide I ache or I'm numbed into a depression which is worse because it immobilizes me. And I'm like: ♫ Sound the bugle now... play it just for me. As the seasons change... remember how I used to be. Now I can't go on...I can't even start. I've got nothing left... just an empty heart. I'm a soldier... wounded so I must give up the fight.There's nothing more for me... lead me away Or leave me lying here. ♫

♫ Then from on high, somewhere in the distance.There's a voice that calls, "Remember who you are... if you lose yourself, Your courage soon will follow, So be strong tonight... remember who you are" Yeah, your a soldier now,Fighting in a battle,To be free once more. Yeah, that's worth fighting for! ♫
   
"Cast away from you all your transgressions which you have committed and make yourselves a new heart and a new spirit! For why will you die, O house of Israel? "For I have no pleasure in the death of anyone who dies," declares the Lord GOD. "Therefore, repent and live." (Ezekiel 18:31-32)

"I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. I will give you a NEW heart and put a NEW spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws."(Ezekiel 36: 25-27) "Then the nations will know that I am the LORD, declares the Sovereign LORD, when I am proved holy through you before their eyes" (vs. 25-27)

UNITY! =)

Hey everyone =) sorry I haven't been blogging this summer so I'm really behind on sharing what God has been teaching me. So I saw the post below on a facebook group a while back and it was exciting to read and encouraging coz I had the idea of planning the "Dream of a King" unity worship event for this summer but I was discouraged by all my failures over the years. But yeah, God is really creating unity around the world which means global revival is about to happen soon!! Check out what was going on in Kenya:


Tr DanielThe Voice of Christian Youth Foundation

Exactly 1 month to the GLOBAL REVIVAL- KENYA CHAPTER event with the servant of God Apostle Mary Magdalene Wangui :

A date like of today next month, one of the biggest and most significant event to the body of Jesus Christ and nations of the world will be taking place here in Nairobi, Kenya at Uhuru Park grounds.

Preachers from different countries of the world will be gathered at Uhuru Park for the GLOBAL REVIVAL event. Local and international gospel artists will also be there, not to entertain but to praise the King of kings as they tap into the revival grace for their singing gifts.

From Africa we have preachers attending from South Africa, Ghana, Ethiopia, Nigeria, Congo, Malawi, Zambia, Cameroon, Rwanda, Burundi, Uganda, Tanzania, Mozambique, Botswana...The rest from Europe, America and Asia.

Continue praying with us for revival in the ongoing 90 days of global revival prayers that began on 1st June and concludes on 30th August with the gathering at Uhuru Park from 30th Aug. to 1st Sept. 2013. Pray for the event too!

If you would like to invest in this Global Revival event either materially or financially call us on the number below or email: apostle@thewillofGodchurch.net

If got any questions please call today: +254717 287782.‪#‎GlobalRevivalKE‬

Unlike ·  · Share · 5 minutes ago near Nairobi, Kenya · 

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I was going to do this post after I read it but I was mostly busy, exhausted and overwhelmed this summer so I didn't. And then last week I found out about this ONE LOVE event that happened at USC on August 28th.

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I didn't go to the event but I heard it was really powerful! Check out the event page on facebook! =)

Tonight at 7pm in the MCC is "The Dream of a King" event. It's poorly planned. But God has brought me this far in spite of my failures and weaknesses. And I'm just standing on His Word and going ahead with the event. Please pray with me for breakthrough. I know I need it! Lord we want more of You! Baptize us with more of your Love. Spirit break out! Break our walls down! Spirit break out! Heaven come down! Amen. All the Glory goes to You Lord! Show us Your glory tonight! =)

(Oh yeah, and it's a New Year!! New Beginnings! Rosh Hashanah (head of the Jewish year holiday) was the past 3 days! Praise God for a Fresh Start and New Mercies!! He makes beautiful things out of us! =)

"Listen, a noise on the mountains,

    like that of a great multitude!

Listen, an uproar among the kingdoms,

    like nations massing together!

The Lord Almighty is mustering

    an army for war." (Isaiah 13: 4)

God is building His army now. Preparing us for war.  WE ARE His army. UNITED we stand! Check out my previous posts: UNITED, Be ONE, ONE New Man... and the rest about the importance of Unity! Let's do this!! #Acts1-2 :) What's the war we are being prepared to fight?... ohhh the battle is raging! More details to come! 

Walk by FAITH!

God has just been reminding me to:
1. Walk by faith not by sight- It's about trusting and obeying God. Not about seeing fruit and being affirmed by people... He is the Lord of the Harvest, not me. My job is to be faithful in following Him.
2. Take the Narrow Road- Seek Him with my whole heart. Let Him satisfy my thrist fully. Walking in the way of Love: Dying to myself in order to live fully (love deeply).
3. Fix my eyes on Jesus. Not to look to the right or the left. Not to be distracted by the waves.
4. Walk by the Spirit - Be obedient to His promptings and convictions.
4. Look forward. Look up. - Yes I have failed a lot- failed to obey Him/failed to love/ failed to be myself a lot but I should not let my past failures discourage me and keep me bound.

• I should look up to Him for He is my strength, all that I need: grace, mercy and His unfailing Love.
• Look up to Him for His approval- that's the only opinion that really matters at the end of the day- How unconditionally loved I am by Him.
• Look forward to the future in the hope of salvation- seeing all His promises come to fruition... and the greatest reward... being one with Him.

Lord, I surrender all to You. So help me. In Jesus Name Amen :-)

Check out this Word from one of the sites God led me to for encouragement and confirmation: A New Road. God is doing a New thing in this season that's why we really need to walk by faith.